Let Go of Fear

The power of letting go of fear is incredible.  If you just let go, you can go on amazing journeys.  Can’t say I’m perfect here, but there is one fear I did let go of, and it led me down a new path full new opportunities and ways to function in the world. 

During the first confinement I started spending a lot more time on social media.  At first it was great, lots of togetherness and people getting along.  It really felt like humanity was taking a step in the right direction.  Then came the media intervening.  Fear took over, and the platforms were full of virtue-signalling and cancellations left and right.  Little by little I started to feel bad.  My energy was drained and I started dreading waking up every day and running my business.  What if I accidentally said or did something wrong in the eyes of others, despite trying my best?  My energy became severely off-balance and lethargy kicked in.  I lived in a constant state of fear.  What’s strange is that I’m not really afraid of a little confrontation if it’s face to face.  It’s just that bizarre hiding behind a screen thing that really creeps me out.  Anyone else?  Of course there are others, and that's why this blog entry exists to let you know that you are not alone!

You bring people in with light, not darkness.

I started to become one of those people for a hot minute.  I thought maybe it would make me feel better.  Maybe I was doing something wrong.  Instead I felt even more burnt out and depressed. 

I started wishing for an internet free life.  Don’t get me wrong, 99.9% of my circle on social media are great.  Friendly, fun, and have treated me and my business wonderfully.  It’s those bad vibe trolls that can really drag you down with hateful messages and comments.  No matter how much you strive to be perfect, there are people that will always find a problem with you.  Don’t cower to them.  They will never be happy.  If you are like me and social media is really dragging you down, there are a few things you can do to not feel so trapped.  If you can afford it, hire someone to run your account.  If not, then deleting it is an option.  We’ve only been using social media to run our businesses for a short time!  We did it before, and we can do it now, so don’t let that fear stop you.  There are plenty of resources on the internet of how to successfully do this.  We aren’t alone in this battle. However, if you decide to stay on social media, here are some tips to lessen the burden of the hate storm:

  1. Only follow people that uplift you.  If you really can’t unfollow someone for some reason (family members, etc), then you can mute them. 
  2. Delete nasty comments and messages, and block. Some people have the theory that you need to be fully transparent and keep the bad with the good on your page.  To each their own, but if you are someone already bothered by social media, get those low vibrating people off your page!  Don’t even think twice.  They are just there to stir the pot. 
  3. If you have other devices aside from your phone with your social media apps, then delete them off your phone, so you are not tempted to look at them as much. Trust me!  It’s difficult at first, but you get used to it, and it’s quite nice.
  4. If you can’t afford to hire someone to run your page, then ask a family member or friend for occasional help in exchange for a service you can provide or product you can offer. 
  5. Now is the time to remember that there are wonderful places that are a bit less social, and more based on the content you post. I really enjoy Pinterest and Flickr.  There’s also Tumblr, Deviant Art, Live Journal, and so many more. 
  6. Take frequent breaks. If you worry about losing business, you will lose more if you end up burning out in the end. 
  7. Don’t follow media outlets. Just don’t do it. 
  8. Remember the media lies. Doesn’t matter what side you are on.  This has been such a huge lesson to me, as I live in a country I was not born in.  Seeing the media from two different sides of the pond covering the same things…Yeah, the media lies.
  9. Form a community of like-minded individuals who make you feel supported.
  10. Soon I’ll have a blog on Dunbar’s number, but for now read up on it, and realize there is some truth to this. You are only one person, and can only do so much before stripping away your spirit and energy.  Find one thing you are passionate about and work towards making it better.  Maybe it’s hungry children, human rights,  saving the bees, or eliminating pesticides in food crops.  Realistically you can put your energy into one, but you can’t put your full energy into all of them.  Imagine this, if every person picked just one humanitarian thing to donate their time to, the world would be darn near perfect. 

You see, my personal philosophy is this:  We are all here for a reason.  We all have a different path, and a different level of evolution than the person next to us.  We can stand on our soap boxes and yell all we want, but it’s mostly going to fall on deaf ears unless the universe pushes someone in our direction.  We receive guidance when we have reached that stage in our evolvement process.  Those who aren’t?  Don’t spend time pushing harder, getting angrier, accusing more, cancelling.  You are only hurting yourself and lowering your vibration. This is what can make things better.  When did hate ever make things better?  If your neighbor chooses to do something differently than you, maybe instead of judging and blocking them out, hear what they have to say and understand their reasoning.  Ask questions about why they did things the way they did, and before you judge, sit with it for a while.  It’s key to try and understand others. 

Another day I’ll talk about all of the help I had to overcome my fear of social media.  Why getting rid of it or taking frequent breaks is not caving to fear.  I’ll also do another post on some amazing self-care techniques I use when social media did get the better of me.  Jewelry is one of them!!!

-xo Jonua

Some great resources:

Flourish & Thrive Academy - I suggest their classes, coaching, and podcast because they are just a beacon of light!  They encourage people to do their best despite circumstances, and if you give the podcast a listen, you'll quickly see Tracy's mindset.  It's refreshing and gives you a place to rest your head, all the while furthering your business! 

Africa Brooke - She is a beautiful soul, writer, and consultant who doesn't hold back her feelings on cancel culture and other things going on in the world.  She helps other to move through self-censorship and other forms of self-sabotage. 

Dr. Christine Marie - A bada** woman who is a Trauma-informed media consultant.  She specializes in media misrepresentation, humiliation, survivor stories, cancel culture, kindess, and dignity. 

*This blog post is mainly geared at inviduals who live in fear despite no wrongdoing.  If you are someone who has wronged any individuals (animals, the environment, etc) please realize it is not too late to get help.  I am not a trained individual so: If you did actually do something you are at fault for, take some time away from your platforms.  Get help from a trained mental health professional or coach to see how you can improve yourself and heal.  Most bad behavior and hate comes from some sort of trauma or biased upbringing that might be really difficult to undo on your own.  Get the help you need and work on your evolutionary progression at being a better human and breaking old patterns.  You can do it!  

2 comments

  • Social media has become a very scary place ineed if you hate confrontation! For me disconnecting is the only way to for me not to dwell on the terrible things I read and see. It is not the same for alot of people of course. I have had to accept I think and feel things more deeply than others and social media is just not good match for me. Xx

    Sarah
  • This is a great post. I constantly live in fear of saying something wrong, and constantly correct things on my Facebook page. I want to live in a society where this is not necessary. We are all human and we all make mistakes. A few years back I got constantly harrassed for posting a Walt Whitman poem on my page, because apparently he is sexist???!! You can’t keep up at one point. Bad people have made good art or good points historically. If we cancel everyone for their mistakes there will be no one and nothing left.

    Heather Mom of 5

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